The Bad Guy

       

                A few months ago I had to smile when a 5 year old described for me the events of Lincoln's assassination. In his words, the reason John Wilkes Boothe killed the President of the United States was simply "cuz he's the bad guy." When I think back on my 5 year old mind, that's what evil came down to - he's the bad guy. Max was right in a way. After all I don't believe Mr. Boothe had much good in his heart when he pulled trigger. However, I no longer believe that reasons for evil are always because "he's the bad guy."

        I mentioned a few posts back that my friends and I enjoy the British drama "Merlin." The show centered around Merlin and 3 other characters. One was the infamous Morgan Le Fey though in this particular adaption of the legend her name was Morgana Pendragon. The show begins with Merlin, Morgana and their friends Arthur and Gwen working together for the good of the kingdom, but over time Morgana becomes the arch nemesis of Camelot. Merlin, Arthur and Gwen spent their time trying to defeat her. In the end was I happy to see the end to "the bad guy?" No, because I saw what drove her to such madness. Though I never condoned her actions and the character did upset me many many times, I sympathized with her plight in life. She was lied to time and time again, and she was left with nowhere to turn. The only person who offered her comfort in trouble was the person who led her to a path of destruction. My heart ached for this bad guy.

        Several other movies and shows I've seen lately draw the same emotion for me. Many movie goers enjoyed Avengers over the past summer. I must agree that Loki was a bit full of himself, but he did have to live in the shadow of his older brother all of his life. Guy of Gisborne from BBC Robin Hood was never one of my favorites, but you could see the battle in his mind. He wanted to do right by Marian, but he also wanted to make a name for himself after suffering the great loss of his parents as a child. Regina from Once Upon a Time also sunk beneath the weight of her family issues.

      Am I saying there is an excuse for evil? No way! Sin is sin, and sin must be punished. There is a line in a song called "Angel" by Within Temptation that gets me every time. It says, "This world may have failed you, it doesn't give you the reason why. You could have chosen a different path in life." How true this is. Life can really be tough sometimes, and some people seem to have it tougher than others. Really it can be a wonder that more people don't wonder around tearing apart people's lives or coming up with evil plans to take over the world.

      This is why I believe I have come to appreciate good villains in stories. I love when a writer can create a scenario when you sympathize with the bad guy. You may not want to see their plan succeed, but you crave redemption or a second chance for them. I don't want to see them plummeting to their deaths at the end as they did in my favorite childhood Disney movies. These complex characters remind me of the depravity of man. Each one of us is a step a way from self destruction. One common theme you see in villains is they always seem to end worse off then when they began their quest to harm another. By God's grace He has given me a second birth in Him to live a life pleasing to Him. I no longer have to wallow in my sin and self destruction. I can find redemption in Him as is the hope of all who believe in Him. Every human being on the planet is a step away from these dark paths if not for the grace of God. Even when we do fail, He is a God of redemption and second chances.

       Why do I love "the bad guy?" Because they remind me that I would be just as bad without my Savior.

His Coffers are Full

  Some days I find myself struggling with life. For the most part I'd like to think I am a grateful person content with my state of life. After all, I do have a wonderful family, a job that brings me great joy, another job that stretches me, good neighbors and a Bible believing church to attend. I also praise the Lord for many wonderful friends that constantly challenge me. Yet despite these good fortunes, there are times when the devil gets a hold of my heart and I complain.

   Just like the children of Israel in the wilderness, I find myself wanting more of what I do not have. God granted the Israelites their safety and freedom to enter the Promised Land just as He has blessed me with all the things I mentioned before, yet in our human nature it never seems enough.

    A few times this week I found myself in the midst of a pity party. Why did God allow a car accident to happen, why can't I find a car, why can't I get full time work, why can't I be a better teacher, why is everything always a struggle? Why, why why??? It seemed the only thing I could think about. At the same time I was frustrated because I knew there are bigger problems than my own.

    This weekend I was able to talk to a friend going through similar trials of her own. Together we discussed our need to rely on God through these difficult times in life, but I finally had my "aha" moment in church yesterday morning. There we sang the old hymn "Child of the King." The first verse says," His coffers are full, He has riches untold." The chorus follows up by stating, "with Jesus my Savior, I'm a child of the King."

   BAM! Here I am worrying about where the money for my next bill will come from when I need look no further than my own Heavenly Father. I've always said that every time things get hard, the money, the transportation or whatever is always supplied. Philippians 4:19 confirms this from God's Word. Yes, life does get hard, and I do need to do what I can to live life pleasing to God. However, He knows my needs and He has always provided. To worry and pity myself is foolish. Instead I should be thankful for the protection God gave me in my car accident. After all, it was an accident and something important I learned from. The car search may not have been fruitful yet, but that may mean God wants me to wait for a car that will meet my needs without the frustrations of a shot gun purchase. The same can be said of looking for full time work, and I certainly am learning much about becoming a better teacher in my current positions. As I trust Him and look to my King's guidance, everything else will begin to fall into place. I am already thinking of many things I can do in the absence of my pity parties.

   There may not be a Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men in my life to help me out in my time of crisis, but that's ok because I have Someone far better. My Heavenly Father and King, my God who loves me so much He sent his only Son to die for me, so I can become His child. I am a daughter of the King, a princess, and I know He will provide for my every need. This serves as a more blessed place of thought than my own self reliance.

Destinies are Troublesome Things Indeed

This morning during my quiet time with the Lord, I read this quote that has been sticking with me:

"Sow an act, and you reap a habit. Sow a habit, and you reap a character. Sow a character, and you reap a destiny." ~Anonymous

What a thought! This quote basically is saying that one choice you make today can determine the course of your life. This may sound harsh or perhaps dramatic, but I truly believe there is some great truth in this statement. For example, if I choose to trust myself today, then next time I might do the same. Before I know it, I am trusting myself and God falls to the wayside. This is no way to live my life, but I know far too often I can fall into the snare of these temptations.

    On the way to school I was listening to the radio. The particular discussion centered around how exciting it can be to look at yourself 10 years ago. The radio host said that even on your crappiest day if you look back on where you were 10 years ago, you will feel happier when you see how far you have come. "Give yourself a pat on the back," he said.

     I disagree. Sure, my life has changed a lot over the past 10 years. I would even say my life has indeed changed for the better, and furthermore, it is encouraging on a crappy day. The problem I heard in the conversation was no mention of God. Nothing in my life that is worth having is here because of my own merit. Everything "I" have accomplished, all of "my" relationships, and every blessing "I" own in life has nothing to do with me. These are all the rich blessings from my ever merciful and gracious God.

      This past week I have been going through one of life's tougher type of experiences. Truly it isn't anything too tragic, but it is a trial none-the-less. It has been a week when I am reminded how much I am in need of a Savior. As a human, I am so fallible, but God in His mercy still continues to meet my needs no matter what mistakes I make. My prayer would be to act in a way that trusts the Lord which would lead to a habit of prayer which would lead to a godly character and finally a destiny of one who constantly lives out the Lord's will.

    These trials prove that life is never easy, but He is still so good.